I am passionate in my belief that everyone is good enough, everyone can reach their passion and live a life they love. I think that this is one of the main reasons I love working as a coach so much. I love it when a client who lacks self beliefs shares in detail their ultimate goals and then together we unlock a strategy and make it happen!
My clients come to coaching for a whole host of reasons, some want to find a more rewarding career, some people want to find more effective ways to lead their team, some people want to find a fulfilling relationship and others want to work on their own confidence. At the heart of all of these changes is self belief and that nagging question which propels self doubt like rocket fuel “am I good enough”
Let’s just start by saying yes you are! We all are.
We all deserve the basic human right to be happy and live the life we want!
So how do you start believing your good enough!
This is one of my biggies! Self care. You need to look after yourself first before you can be of any help to anyone else! Think back to the last time you were on a plane listening to the safety message. In the event of an emergency what do they tell you to do? Help everyone else first, ensure everyone else had their oxygen masks on, then put yours on? Of course not, they tell you to look after yourself first then help others, even children second. Why? Because if you don’t look after yourself and fall unconscious because you have no oxygen you’re no help to anyone!
Positive self talk
This is very powerful, give it a try and I promise you if you stick at it you will notice a difference. Ignore your self doubt and negative self talk as though you have already achieved your goal. For example replace, I am a rubbish manager with “I am a great leader and I am brilliant at managing my team” or replace I don’t know if I will get a new job “I will find a new job and I will write my CV to demonstrate all my amazing experience”
It will feel odd at first, and it will take time, but I promise you positive self talk will have a massive impact.
Proving it to yourself
As humans we are programmed to look for danger, it’s that flight or fight notion. This is a very useful tool if you are face to face with a lion or wild buffalo and need your adrenaline to kick in so you can escape danger. However this tool no longer serves you in everyday life, as we don’t need to be constantly on the look out for things that will hurt us.
What would be more useful in this day and age where we don’t have to fight lions anymore is to start to notice the positive stuff so you can be armed with evidence of all your achievements. Start to notice things you are proud of, start a journal and read over it on a regular basis. Prove to yourself just how amazing you are!
Remove negative people from your life
Asses who you let into your life, you role in life isn’t to make everyone feel better. It’s a nice quality to have but energy goes in both directions. If all you experience is negative energy, your life will be completely filled with it! Perhaps a friend sees you as an shoulder to cry on, all the time. Or your boss constantly moans about the team to you or maybe a family member is always negative? These people are not healthy to be around. Okay so we don’t want to abandon family or friends but we can limit how much time we listen and take on board that negative energy.
Would you fill your car with poor quality petrol and expect it to run at full capacity? No, I didn’t think so! It’s the same with your body, fill it with healthy and nutritional food and you will run at peak performance.
Changing years of mental conditioning is tricky, but persevere and you will notice a difference. Ask a friend to point out when you are being harsh on yourself or work with a coach to allow you to explore how you can feel good enough, because trust me, you really are!
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