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How Do I Overcome My Fears?

How do I overcome my fears? It’s something I am asked as a coach time and time again. Imagine if you were more afraid of what life would be like if you didn’t follow through on something. If you didn’t take action. If you didn’t make your dream a reality?

How much more useful would that type of fear be?

This mindset is the difference between successful and unsuccessful  people. Fear isn’t a bad thing, fear isn’t something that you need to avoid.

Fear can fuel you to make your dreams a reality.

Successful people fear missing out, they fear the cost of not doing something. They fear not taking the risk, both in business and their personal life. Successful people are excited by fear, because fear means progress.

So how do you use fear in a positive way?


Eliminate self doubt

Learning to eliminate self doubt is something that i am so passionate about. This month, I’ve been writing about all things relationships. Romantic ones, work related and the relationship you have with yourself.

This week I want to write about the relationship you have with your mind because I think this is one of the most abused (and allowed) relationships

Let’s think about it for a moment. You meet up with a friend for coffee, she greets you by telling you how much weight you’ve put on since you last met, how that jumper looks like an old bin bag on you oh and blue really isn’t your colour.

Over a brownie, You tell her about a new opportunity you are thinking about going for and she shuts you down with a “blimey, you don’t have the right experience for that and you are way too old, don’t even think about it. You would never get it anyway, not with a face like yours, I’d stop with these thoughts because you really do sound like an idiot.

You arrive home feeling like the total loser that you are and you’ve put your dreams in the bin where they belong!

What would you do next?..

Increasing your self-esteem on the most depressing day of the year

Oh great, there’s even an awareness day to mark just how low my self-esteem is.. Blue Monday is described as the most depressing day of the year. It’s based on a combination of;

  • How much time that’s passed since you made your new year’s resolutions,
  • Your low motivational levels,
  • The cold weather,
  • Christmas is now a distant memory, yet most of us are still paying for it,
  • Your debt levels (that credit card will be due soon)




Are you a perfectionist? “I don’t have time to think about myself or take care of my own needs. Everyone else comes first; my kids, my husband, work…even the dog comes before me! I have to keep all the plates spinning; I have to be an amazing mother and wife and be successful at work…I just need to work out how to be perfect”

Sound familiar?




Dating  (gulp…. I’d rather stick needles in my eyes)

This was the response one of my clients had when we spoke about the prospect of dating.

As it’s Halloween this month, I’ve been thinking about the topics that generate the most fear for my coaching clients.

Dating is always in the top 5!

Why is it that dating causes so much fear?..



Fear, that wretched feeling when you are about to do something that scares the living day lights out of you. Years ago, I would have let fear get in between me and my goals and stop me achieving what I really wanted out of life.

Now, I don’t let it.

It’s not because I don’t feel fear, of course I do, I just don’t let it stop me.



Throughout my 13-year career, I have helped many people become great decision makers and eliminated their fear of making the “wrong” choice, in turn helping them to become happier, less stressed and far more productive in their life.

Constantly worrying about making the “right” choice means that people end up doing nothing, they enter a state of analysis-paralysis and life doesn’t move on. Instead, life is stressful, full of anxiety, mundane and stagnant.

So what exactly can you do to help yourself to become a better decision maker?